Sorry for the off time everyone, but I am ready jump back in. I had planned to go a different direction, but after starting that path too many times to count, I deiced to go a different direction. So with out much further ado, here we go back into the world of obscure words and phrases that only a true salt can enjoy and understand.

Amateur Night really isn’t a night it is the entire day following payday, especially when the ship is in port. The day after pay day can be one filled with hang over’s from the previous night’s fun. This fun can range from simply heading down to your favorite local dinning establishment and stuffing yourself with what ever is on the menu to all sorts of adult fun.

Needless to say the day after payday can be one of a very sluggish crew. People can be hung over from too many drinks or totally exhausted from lack of sleep. The engine rooms can be turned into Engineering Berthing forward and nothing gets done. Since officers are mostly immune to such activities they are so helpful and schedule things such as fire drills or inspections on days such as this.

Getting into your fire fighting gear is no fun under normal conditions, but add in a hang over and you are in for a good deal of fun. Possibly the worst example of this was the day after Thanksgiving in 1991. The Helo smash and crash team for my ship had to take part in training. We HAD to pass on Friday or meet the wrath of our captain, COMDERSON 10, and who knows who else. We were all told specifically, “DO NOT DRINK!” by the captain, CHENG, DCA, and MPA. To make matters worse we were leaving on a Med Cruise the following Monday and this was our last night to really enjoy ourselves. So if the team did not pass Friday special permission and costs would be needed to light the fire on Saturday and/or Sunday.

Well, myself and the rest of the JP5 team went out and really enjoyed out last night of stateside fun. The next morning at 0600 we had to muster with the remainder of the team. I woke up at 0559 and got dressed. I was so sick all day long. First was class room time when we learned how to put out a fire on the helo deck. One instructor was pretty cocky telling us all that “Nobody here knows their job and I am going to make sure you do when you leave.” I being stupid at the time raised my hand and told him I knew my job 100%. He looked at me, uttered a rather bad term and asked me to explain my job in the event of a helo crash. I told him exactly what I would do. Turn off the fuel pump, secure the fuel supply valve, and head back to central control to my muster station to be accounted for. My LPO snickered and the team leader dropped his head into his hands. The instructor laughed and said 100% correct and refereed to me in a less than proper manner.

We then went out to the fire pit and stood by as the fire was set to raging. It was a pit filled with water and diesel fuel floated on top. Normally the team used foam to put out a fire, but not today. We used water only. I was SO sick standing out in the burning sun facing this monstrous fire. So were the other JP5 crew members. Good thing all we had to do was stand there and not pass out.

The fire crew put out the fire well under the time requirement and overall we received an above average, this is a hard score to get. None of us fuel crew did get sick, although I know I could have at any time. We all returned to the ship where we were quickly chewed out by the MPS and CHENG. The CHENG, who rarely swore, called us $*%&^$&# amateurs. He also told us good thing we passed or our butts would be standing before the captain that afternoon. That was my one and only Amateur night.